Since I lost my Bible a couple of months ago I have felt cast adrift in many ways, though one good thing is that I have realized a new love of scripture. I read the Words and I want to absorb them into my being – I want to study more and learn more. I look forward to my Bible reading time every day.
But the difficulty is that my prayer life has suffered. I had prayer lists in my old Bible that I have had a hard time replacing. At first I kept thinking it would turn up and I wouldn’t have to replace them; and then I knew I wouldn’t be able to get them exactly right so I kept putting it off. I have spent more time reading and studying the Word and thinking about it and God – and less time talking to God. It’s a bit ironic that the study of God might replace the relationship with God… perhaps reading and studying and thinking are things I can control, but when I pray I give control to God. It is giving Him permission to use me, to change me, to mold me. Praying is not just a list of people and things to say to God, it is a giving of myself and my concerns to Him.
Lord, forgive me.